










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 904 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 152 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2206 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,034 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 338 | 33% |
| Smokes | 327 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 212 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 157 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $618,363 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JustNash | 203 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #2 | George Foreman | 73 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #3 | char | 46 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #4 | Rooster Ric | 34 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | farberware | 32 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | char | +3.45 | 37 | 37 |
| #2 | LeRoy Jenkins | +1.59 | 58 | 15 |
| #3 | Rooster Ric | +1.04 | 42 | 48 |
| #4 | George Foreman | +0.43 | 54 | 29 |
| #5 | JustNash | -2.38 | 31 | 24 |





