








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 189 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 152 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 144 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5014 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,473 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3277 | 21% |
| Smokes | 4887 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4055 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3254 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,336,632 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 703 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jigaboo | 53% | 75 |
| #2 | !Kosmmy | 52% | 94 |
| #3 | ✪ patient zero | 49% | 155 |
| #4 | KADY SNOW | 46% | 118 |
| #5 | FANY. | 45% | 330 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ patient zero | 20 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Casper | 15 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | ★QInfinite★ | 14 | 0.0072 |
| #4 | FANY. | 13 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | 유︎ ☯︎ Boca ™ | 11 | 0.0129 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ KriTiKaL™ | 970 | 0.10 | 27 min |
| #2 | KADY SNOW | 485 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #3 | ✪ patient zero | 401 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | Casper | 325 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #5 | !Kosmmy | 317 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !Kosmmy | +4.68 | 81 | 68 |
| #2 | 유︎ ☯︎ Boca ™ | +3.89 | 86 | 70 |
| #3 | FANY. | +2.85 | 76 | 26 |
| #4 | jigaboo | +2.72 | 79 | 55 |
| #5 | ✪ KriTiKaL™ | +1.99 | 71 | 67 |





