








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 448 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
886 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,856 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 633 | 34% |
| Smokes | 687 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 232 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 304 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $672,317 of utility $236 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samstorm | 53% | 17 |
| #2 | | 42% | 31 |
| #3 | Georgia Max Yuna | 40% | 20 |
| #4 | Zatorias | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | sharkyyuna | 39% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Georgia Max Yuna | 40% | 20 |
| #4 | Zatorias | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | sharkyyuna | 39% | 44 |
| #6 | Jax | 36% | 11 |
| #7 | liuminus | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samstorm | 3 | 0.0100 |
| #2 | sharkyyuna | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Zatorias | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Jax | 1 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Georgia Max Yuna | 75 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | | 66 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Zatorias | 24 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | Jax | 21 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | Samstorm | 12 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | | +6.71 | 46 | 62 |
| #2 | sharkyyuna | +0.08 | 54 | 11 |
| #3 | Jax | -0.08 | 12 | 19 |
| #4 | Samstorm | -0.30 | 28 | 15 |
| #5 | GKnight | -1.92 | 21 | 44 |





