








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 374 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
644 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,474 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 388 | 26% |
| Smokes | 538 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 193 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 355 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $229,663 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 197 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ultra | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | Vi2NiM | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | RIHSURI | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | Samstorm | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | Haru Urara | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | sharkyyuna | 39% | 41 |
| #11 | Georgia Max Yuna | 35% | 20 |
| #12 | Nani Sore | 33% | 6 |
| #13 | nice nature | 33% | 6 |
| #14 | liuminus | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sharkyyuna | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Samstorm | 2 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | Haru Urara | 2 | 0.0227 |
| #4 | GKnight | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Zatorias | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Georgia Max Yuna | 79 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | GKnight | 55 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Zatorias | 32 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Ultra | 27 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| #5 | Vi2NiM | 27 | 0.31 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ultra | +7.98 | 81 | 54 |
| #2 | | +6.19 | 48 | 61 |
| #3 | nice nature | +0.44 | 58 | 51 |
| #4 | Nani Sore | -0.12 | 65 | 43 |
| #5 | Haru Urara | -0.85 | 11 | 69 |





