








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1131 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,440 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 274 | 19% |
| Smokes | 406 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 390 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 370 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $348,408 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 100 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | feNster | 100% | 8 |
| #2 | ︻デ 一 Kira | 100% | 9 |
| #3 | GlobalKiller | 78% | 9 |
| #4 | Lord Rev1[21]e | 73% | 11 |
| #5 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 67% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Lord Rev1[21]e | 73% | 11 |
| #5 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 67% | 27 |
| #6 | Matty | 63% | 8 |
| #7 | bred | 61% | 23 |
| #8 | blades | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 6 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | bred | 5 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | Matty | 4 | 0.0179 |
| #4 | feNster | 2 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | Lord Rev1[21]e | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 87 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | bred | 63 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | ︻デ 一 Kira | 60 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #4 | blades | 53 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #5 | Lord Rev1[21]e | 44 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lord Rev1[21]e | +3.48 | 87 | 65 |
| #2 | fox | +2.89 | 81 | 37 |
| #3 | ✪ RIDGBAK | +1.50 | 77 | 55 |
| #4 | GlobalKiller | +1.43 | 89 | 48 |
| #5 | Matty | +1.42 | 58 | 63 |





