








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 172 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 251 matches | ||
| Premier | 81 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4333 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,240 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3502 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2872 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2274 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3592 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $878,342 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 637 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gem1ni | 70% | 20 |
| #2 | JumpOLot | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | Lord Rev1[21]e | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | feNster | 52% | 147 |
| #5 | Lvbster | 51% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Lvbster | 51% | 35 |
| #6 | Leg1oN | 49% | 41 |
| #7 | Snorio Terrance | 48% | 25 |
| #8 | GlobalKiller | 48% | 25 |
| #9 | Kevin ™ | 47% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | feNster | 29 | 0.0073 |
| #2 | Lord Rev1[21]e | 5 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | Snorio Terrance | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | GlobalKiller | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Lvbster | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | feNster | 362 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | Leg1oN | 322 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #3 | JumpOLot | 177 | 0.30 | 5 min |
| #4 | Lvbster | 162 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | Kevin ™ | 151 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GlobalKiller | +3.74 | 94 | 58 |
| #2 | Lord Rev1[21]e | +3.38 | 90 | 73 |
| #3 | Lvbster | +2.97 | 85 | 71 |
| #4 | Kevin ™ | +1.43 | 82 | 67 |
| #5 | JumpOLot | +1.37 | 79 | 64 |





