








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 187 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 151 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1647 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,333 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 783 | 11% |
| Smokes | 2841 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1737 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1972 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,296,103 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boegh | 60% | 45 |
| #2 | flaskedrengen | 52% | 71 |
| #3 | headless | 51% | 67 |
| #4 | **DeViL** | 49% | 175 |
| #5 | M0rt3n | 47% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StokholmSyndromet | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | headless | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | **DeViL** | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | flaskedrengen | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Gude | 2 | 0.0013 |





