








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 297 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 247 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2409 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,493 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2596 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3752 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2989 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3156 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $228,819 of utility $36 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 239 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drew_- | 52% | 31 |
| #2 | SamoanPride | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | Saki | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | iMpakT | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | baordog | 30% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | SamoanPride | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | Saki | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | iMpakT | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | baordog | 30% | 37 |
| #6 | n1ps | 27% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n1ps | 6 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | drew_- | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | iMpakT | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Saki | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | SamoanPride | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n1ps | 159 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #2 | iMpakT | 126 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | baordog | 123 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | drew_- | 88 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Saki | 88 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n1ps | +2.16 | 56 | 71 |
| #2 | SamoanPride | +1.03 | 67 | 58 |
| #3 | drew_- | +1.01 | 49 | 68 |
| #4 | iMpakT | -0.50 | 54 | 70 |
| #5 | baordog | -1.05 | 68 | 54 |





