








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 176 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Agency | 127 matches | ||
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 14 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1590 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,969 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1213 | 24% |
| Smokes | 698 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 1687 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1371 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $926,420 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 225 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harehi | 89% | 38 |
| #2 | Shakana | 85% | 75 |
| #3 | TAPPY_HK LUN_CS | 83% | 23 |
| #4 | Ernest | 82% | 56 |
| #5 | Jo7 | 81% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | kur0 | 74% | 66 |
| #7 | Shalu | 73% | 125 |
| #8 | z0owater | 70% | 205 |
| #9 | nae | 64% | 66 |
| #10 | Arnextz | 63% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | z0owater | 29 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | nae | 11 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | Shalu | 10 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | kur0 | 10 | 0.0083 |
| #5 | TAPPY_HK LUN_CS | 4 | 0.0095 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | z0owater | 508 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #2 | kur0 | 322 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #3 | nae | 212 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Shalu | 148 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | Harehi | 147 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jo7 | +5.60 | 79 | 54 |
| #2 | kur0 | +4.37 | 91 | 53 |
| #3 | Shalu | +4.18 | 75 | 36 |
| #4 | Arnextz | +4.00 | 49 | 50 |
| #5 | Ernest | +3.93 | 93 | 10 |





