








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 133 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Wingman | 71 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2386 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,529 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3069 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3290 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1882 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2288 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $764,498 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 447 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ankara messi | 54% | 171 |
| #2 | baz | 52% | 92 |
| #3 | Chr1sse | 51% | 171 |
| #4 | siuhy | 50% | 210 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ankara messi | 54% | 171 |
| #2 | baz | 52% | 92 |
| #3 | Chr1sse | 51% | 171 |
| #4 | siuhy | 50% | 210 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chr1sse | 11 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | ankara messi | 11 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | siuhy | 9 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | baz | 7 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chr1sse | 649 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #2 | siuhy | 638 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #3 | ankara messi | 418 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #4 | baz | 328 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ankara messi | +0.99 | 81 | 65 |
| #2 | baz | +0.74 | 77 | 68 |
| #3 | Chr1sse | +0.72 | 75 | 66 |
| #4 | siuhy | -0.08 | 57 | 69 |
| #5 | M-U-S-S-I | -0.92 | 46 | 62 |





