








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 678 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1118 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,479 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1059 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1390 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 876 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1154 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $902,293 of utility $248 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 249 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jimmy Mushroom | 58% | 62 |
| #2 | PHILIP PARIS | 47% | 19 |
| #3 | Georgexving | 38% | 42 |
| #4 | ball | 38% | 16 |
| #5 | covxnymy | 35% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ball | 38% | 16 |
| #5 | covxnymy | 35% | 63 |
| #6 | αφμ seidu结束 2556 | 33% | 54 |
| #7 | unek :) | 32% | 25 |
| #8 | ΤΟ ΚΑΥΛΙ ΜΟΥ ΚΑΙΕ | 23% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | αφμ seidu结束 2556 | 11 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | covxnymy | 9 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | PHILIP PARIS | 8 | 0.0214 |
| #4 | Georgexving | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | ΤΟ ΚΑΥΛΙ ΜΟΥ ΚΑΙΕ | 2 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | unek :) | 71 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | αφμ seidu结束 2556 | 54 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | covxnymy | 49 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Georgexving | 48 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | ball | 37 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | unek :) | +2.60 | 34 | 59 |
| #2 | αφμ seidu结束 2556 | +2.59 | 70 | 39 |
| #3 | PHILIP PARIS | +2.14 | 63 | 45 |
| #4 | covxnymy | +0.99 | 39 | 34 |
| #5 | Jimmy Mushroom | +0.20 | 79 | 5 |





