








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 180 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Faceit | 78 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4116 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,961 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2548 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3092 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1880 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2441 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $590,372 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 428 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vardu | 56% | 41 |
| #2 | 要 Smäikkä | 52% | 107 |
| #3 | :) | 51% | 73 |
| #4 | Mestari | 50% | 50 |
| #5 | Kailando | 49% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Tumpe | 48% | 140 |
| #8 | Lemmikki | 48% | 46 |
| #9 | Guppy)) | 46% | 153 |
| #10 | Louhiss | 46% | 35 |
| #11 | Guru | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tumpe | 29 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | Lemmikki | 16 | 0.0169 |
| #3 | Guppy)) | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Mestari | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Guru | 4 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tumpe | 403 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | Guppy)) | 399 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #3 | Kailando | 278 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #4 | :) | 231 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | Louhiss | 170 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tumpe | +1.60 | 83 | 62 |
| #2 | Lemmikki | +1.52 | 81 | 55 |
| #3 | :) | +1.36 | 83 | 66 |
| #4 | Guru | +0.88 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | lev1z | +0.14 | 84 | 48 |





