








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1286 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 357 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 180 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 2,091 | |
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




143 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10809 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,520 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12917 | 35% |
| Smokes | 8491 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 8857 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6255 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,554,865 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zöntty | 29 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | tuke | 22 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Monster no homo | 17 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | friendly moose | 16 | 0.0170 |
| #5 | 100W Discoball | 7 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jarmo | +2.98 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | 100W Discoball | +1.79 | 64 | 65 |
| #3 | friendly moose | +0.85 | 69 | 62 |
| #4 | Marone | +0.45 | 75 | 57 |
| #5 | Monster no homo | +0.39 | 75 | 60 |





