








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 148 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 55 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3033 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,472 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2870 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2286 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1616 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1700 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $610,759 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 36 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sho | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | silhoueT_Te ☭ | 55% | 33 |
| #3 | muslim messi peak | 53% | 64 |
| #4 | d1mple | 53% | 36 |
| #5 | retired Fur | 50% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Basheer 3D | 22 | 0.0109 |
| #2 | SLIPPERY GUY | 18 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | forty | 15 | 0.0096 |
| #4 | 7empest | 12 | 0.0104 |
| #5 | muslim messi peak | 4 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SLIPPERY GUY | 381 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | forty | 294 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #3 | 7empest | 209 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #4 | retired Fur | 174 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #5 | muslim messi peak | 135 | 0.11 | 3 min |





