








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 166 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 36 matches | ||
| Esplay | 2 matches | 2,102 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
606 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,118 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 886 | 28% |
| Smokes | 741 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 833 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 658 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $165,463 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R48i | 100% | 5 |
| #2 | Archi ♥ | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | tzaa | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | KarlAlfred | 60% | 10 |
| #5 | murtan | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Archi ♥ | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | tzaa | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | KarlAlfred | 60% | 10 |
| #5 | murtan | 50% | 6 |
| #6 | Rocksteady | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tzaa | 1 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Archi ♥ | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tzaa | 59 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | KarlAlfred | 58 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| #3 | Rocksteady | 55 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #4 | Archi ♥ | 42 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | murtan | 7 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rocksteady | +3.11 | 58 | 87 |
| #2 | Archi ♥ | +2.88 | 94 | 60 |
| #3 | tzaa | +2.37 | 72 | 63 |
| #4 | KarlAlfred | -0.44 | 58 | 71 |
| #5 | xeetstar | -1.00 | 69 | 70 |





