








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 235 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 349 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3421 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,827 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3043 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3998 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4597 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2189 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $984,452 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1058 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | cmrn | 54% | 72 |
| #5 | MaTriXx | 54% | 100 |
| #6 | alfiemead | 53% | 70 |
| #7 | 7oMm1 | 49% | 108 |
| #8 | Rayless | 49% | 258 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TonyDHFC | 7 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Rayless | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | 7oMm1 | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | cmrn | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | alfiemead | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rayless | 1360 | 0.24 | 34 min |
| #2 | cmrn | 329 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #3 | alfiemead | 277 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | 7oMm1 | 268 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | MaTriXx | 232 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 7oMm1 | +2.52 | 88 | 60 |
| #2 | cmrn | +1.29 | 84 | 57 |
| #3 | MaTriXx | +0.75 | 66 | 54 |
| #4 | Magick | +0.74 | 62 | 47 |
| #5 | Rayless | +0.34 | 51 | 62 |





