








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 283 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2120 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,382 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1593 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1981 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1204 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1604 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $645,164 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -悲惨的-- | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | FreaK #Lost_Aim | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | CODENAME 47 | 52% | 48 |
| #4 | shox | 49% | 73 |
| #5 | Drag_Plays | 40% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | FreaK #Lost_Aim | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | CODENAME 47 | 52% | 48 |
| #4 | shox | 49% | 73 |
| #5 | Drag_Plays | 40% | 50 |
| #6 | Sid Max | 33% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drag_Plays | 5 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | shox | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | CODENAME 47 | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | FreaK #Lost_Aim | 2 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drag_Plays | 114 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | shox | 83 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | CODENAME 47 | 58 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | -悲惨的-- | 42 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Sid Max | 33 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -悲惨的-- | +3.64 | 86 | 62 |
| #2 | Sid Max | +1.92 | 70 | 63 |
| #3 | Drag_Plays | +1.73 | 88 | 59 |
| #4 | FreaK #Lost_Aim | +1.04 | 68 | 41 |
| #5 | arT | +0.85 | 71 | 64 |





