








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 366 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 204 matches | ||
| Faceit | 80 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3512 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,305 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8249 | 45% |
| Smokes | 4376 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3007 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2673 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,492,241 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 585 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lil Laggy | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | 1SpotScott | 55% | 86 |
| #3 | ryansky | 52% | 58 |
| #4 | wUtiZPoon? | 50% | 235 |
| #5 | AssistThis | 46% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lil Laggy | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | 1SpotScott | 55% | 86 |
| #3 | ryansky | 52% | 58 |
| #4 | wUtiZPoon? | 50% | 235 |
| #5 | AssistThis | 46% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wUtiZPoon? | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | 1SpotScott | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | ryansky | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | AssistThis | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Lil Laggy | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wUtiZPoon? | 1119 | 0.22 | 28 min |
| #2 | ryansky | 290 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #3 | 1SpotScott | 179 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Lil Laggy | 141 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #5 | AssistThis | 122 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wUtiZPoon? | +1.66 | 86 | 61 |
| #2 | 1SpotScott | +1.43 | 56 | 56 |
| #3 | ryansky | -0.35 | 64 | 66 |
| #4 | MAZZMURKA | -0.77 | 58 | 71 |
| #5 | Lil Laggy | -1.28 | 47 | 57 |





