








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 313 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 552 matches | ||
| Wingman | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6219 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,752 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3826 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3966 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2707 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3253 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,121,708 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plague_doctor[Valk] | 52% | 86 |
| #2 | Crystal Daniel2[Valk] | 51% | 258 |
| #3 | Alexzom12[Valk] | 49% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plague_doctor[Valk] | 52% | 86 |
| #2 | Crystal Daniel2[Valk] | 51% | 258 |
| #3 | Alexzom12[Valk] | 49% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crystal Daniel2[Valk] | 35 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Plague_doctor[Valk] | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Alexzom12[Valk] | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crystal Daniel2[Valk] | 492 | 0.09 | 16 min |
| #2 | Plague_doctor[Valk] | 39 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #3 | Alexzom12[Valk] | 11 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crystal Daniel2[Valk] | +2.62 | 54 | 50 |
| #2 | Sam7372 | +0.88 | 55 | 43 |
| #3 | Alexzom12[Valk] | -1.78 | 31 | 28 |
| #4 | Plague_doctor[Valk] | -2.63 | 18 | 27 |





