








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 208 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3606 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,857 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1233 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2380 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1262 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1982 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $372,449 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rugby League Live 3 | 45% | 125 |
| #2 | Quack | 39% | 31 |
| #3 | 80085 | 39% | 223 |
| #4 | Jassy!Tree! | 36% | 130 |
| #5 | Malf | 35% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Quack | 39% | 31 |
| #3 | 80085 | 39% | 223 |
| #4 | Jassy!Tree! | 36% | 130 |
| #5 | Malf | 35% | 31 |
| #6 | Mr!Drifter! | 29% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jassy!Tree! | 16 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | Quack | 9 | 0.0131 |
| #3 | 80085 | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Rugby League Live 3 | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Mr!Drifter! | 3 | 0.0071 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jassy!Tree! | 194 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #2 | Rugby League Live 3 | 192 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | Malf | 60 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Quack | 30 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mr!Drifter! | 11 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quack | +4.77 | 51 | 37 |
| #2 | Shenlong Unleashed | +3.98 | 72 | 45 |
| #3 | Mr!Drifter! | -1.04 | 42 | 43 |
| #4 | Rugby League Live 3 | -1.89 | 32 | 37 |
| #5 | Malf | -2.62 | 16 | 45 |





