








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 67 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 325 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3769 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,064 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1446 | 13% |
| Smokes | 3572 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3292 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2754 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $808,063 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 43 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ꮤ𐌙𐌔𐌋Ꝋ𐌕𐋅 | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | The Don | 66% | 29 |
| #3 | leeroy jensen | 55% | 47 |
| #4 | bEn xx | 50% | 24 |
| #5 | ☆Kawaii Kayis☆ | 50% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | leeroy jensen | 55% | 47 |
| #4 | bEn xx | 50% | 24 |
| #5 | ☆Kawaii Kayis☆ | 50% | 26 |
| #6 | qvattro | 48% | 188 |
| #7 | log2c | 47% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qvattro | 15 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | log2c | 5 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | The Don | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | leeroy jensen | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | ☆Kawaii Kayis☆ | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qvattro | 108 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #2 | leeroy jensen | 108 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | Ꮤ𐌙𐌔𐌋Ꝋ𐌕𐋅 | 50 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | bEn xx | 43 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | log2c | 35 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | log2c | +1.84 | 75 | 54 |
| #2 | Jove | +1.26 | 72 | 54 |
| #3 | The Don | +1.05 | 39 | 46 |
| #4 | leeroy jensen | +0.22 | 63 | 64 |
| #5 | Ꮤ𐌙𐌔𐌋Ꝋ𐌕𐋅 | -0.90 | 29 | 63 |





