








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 493 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 304 matches | ||
| Wingman | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3851 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,599 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4401 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2602 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 6473 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 4123 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,292,323 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 772 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mikey | 41 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | Anti-stick | 30 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Agent Urquell | 28 | 0.0086 |
| #4 | Mr. Eeyore | 14 | 0.0133 |
| #5 | Catloaf Kory :3 | 13 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mikey | 1427 | 0.18 | 39 min |
| #2 | Agent Urquell | 385 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #3 | Catloaf Kory :3 | 372 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | Mr. Eeyore | 231 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #5 | Anti-stick | 225 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Eeyore | +4.61 | 83 | 53 |
| #2 | Catloaf Kory :3 | +1.26 | 49 | 51 |
| #3 | Mikey | +0.73 | 49 | 75 |
| #4 | zasranejbůhválky | -0.32 | 63 | 59 |
| #5 | Agent Urquell | -0.72 | 34 | 57 |





