








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 413 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 185 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3312 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,038 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2099 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2807 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1949 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2183 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,140,854 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1273 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zk1lle 话筒 | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | Mel | 65% | 112 |
| #3 | BrownChris | 64% | 56 |
| #4 | Olaux | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | Zinx^ | 55% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zk1lle 话筒 | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | Mel | 65% | 112 |
| #3 | BrownChris | 64% | 56 |
| #4 | Olaux | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | Zinx^ | 55% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mel | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | BrownChris | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | zk1lle 话筒 | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mel | 386 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #2 | BrownChris | 270 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | Zinx^ | 154 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Olaux | 47 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | zk1lle 话筒 | 37 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BrownChris | +2.67 | 86 | 67 |
| #2 | Lays | +2.21 | 86 | 59 |
| #3 | zk1lle 话筒 | +1.75 | 58 | 54 |
| #4 | Olaux | +0.34 | 79 | 74 |
| #5 | Zinx^ | -1.86 | 60 | 59 |





