








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 258 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4457 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,946 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4031 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2853 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3302 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2760 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,037,394 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 201 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spiskeparky⛟ | 77% | 22 |
| #2 | Lil G^^ | 72% | 25 |
| #3 | Zrzek | 65% | 69 |
| #4 | ✪ TuciK | 60% | 52 |
| #5 | Ufo85 | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Zrzek | 65% | 69 |
| #4 | ✪ TuciK | 60% | 52 |
| #5 | Ufo85 | 55% | 29 |
| #6 | Asam1 | 49% | 63 |
| #7 | Cr1ses is Back | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asam1 | 9 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Zrzek | 9 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | Cr1ses is Back | 2 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Lil G^^ | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | Ufo85 | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spiskeparky⛟ | 68 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | ✪ TuciK | 67 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Cr1ses is Back | 57 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | Asam1 | 50 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ufo85 | 47 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ufo85 | +4.70 | 81 | 57 |
| #2 | ✪ TuciK | +1.69 | 91 | 54 |
| #3 | Cr1ses is Back | +1.11 | 82 | 57 |
| #4 | PolikCZ | +0.89 | 63 | 66 |
| #5 | Spiskeparky⛟ | +0.23 | 67 | 63 |





