








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 793 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 144 matches | ||
| Wingman | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 1,553 | |
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2479 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,814 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2435 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2253 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1702 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1424 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $937,600 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 393 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gorg0n^ | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | Resky-Rob | 56% | 27 |
| #3 | wôrstpláyér | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | SwiftzZ ❤™ | 55% | 51 |
| #5 | 1666 | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SwiftzZ ❤™ | 269 | 0.28 | 7 min |
| #2 | andre | 208 | 0.38 | 6 min |
| #3 | wôrstpláyér | 130 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #4 | parker | 95 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #5 | Mr.Pringles | 84 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | parker | +3.27 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | SwiftzZ ❤™ | +3.06 | 81 | 64 |
| #3 | Resky-Rob | +1.53 | 75 | 60 |
| #4 | wôrstpláyér | +1.17 | 78 | 65 |
| #5 | eskil | +1.12 | 88 | 53 |





