








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1228 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 230 matches | ||
| Wingman | 179 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 62 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




74 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4829 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,579 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4705 | 44% |
| Smokes | 2933 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 520 | 5% |
| Molotovs | 2421 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,440,098 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓜𝓻𝓦𝓢 | 57% | 139 |
| #2 | mgn | 53% | 90 |
| #3 | Zeus Władca Burz skins.army | 49% | 74 |
| #4 | Übersetze das nicht | 47% | 59 |
| #5 | bella ciao | 43% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓜𝓻𝓦𝓢 | 57% | 139 |
| #2 | mgn | 53% | 90 |
| #3 | Zeus Władca Burz skins.army | 49% | 74 |
| #4 | Übersetze das nicht | 47% | 59 |
| #5 | bella ciao | 43% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mgn | 25 | 0.0146 |
| #2 | 𝓜𝓻𝓦𝓢 | 15 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | Zeus Władca Burz skins.army | 9 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | bella ciao | 4 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | Übersetze das nicht | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓜𝓻𝓦𝓢 | 424 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #2 | mgn | 197 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | Zeus Władca Burz skins.army | 135 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | Übersetze das nicht | 70 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | bella ciao | 52 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bella ciao | +2.11 | 89 | 51 |
| #2 | mgn | +2.11 | 69 | 46 |
| #3 | Dihhers wladca penisow | +1.32 | 79 | 41 |
| #4 | 𝓜𝓻𝓦𝓢 | +0.05 | 50 | 40 |
| #5 | Übersetze das nicht | -0.83 | 54 | 27 |





