








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 181 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
965 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,066 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 949 | 31% |
| Smokes | 724 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 618 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 775 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $261,888 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 192 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jappe | 100% | 5 |
| #2 | 1 | 74% | 19 |
| #3 | Ellu<3 | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | maka paka | 67% | 6 |
| #5 | tr1pb | 65% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | GM Emmi | 64% | 11 |
| #7 | dmoN w tr4cksuit | 63% | 32 |
| #8 | Twitch.tv/maxvep | 60% | 10 |
| #9 | ruoska CSGO500 | 60% | 15 |
| #10 | Niilo | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ellu<3 | 4 | 0.0294 |
| #2 | dmoN w tr4cksuit | 3 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | maka paka | 3 | 0.0238 |
| #4 | GM Emmi | 1 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Niilo | 1 | 0.0068 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dmoN w tr4cksuit | 94 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | 1 | 87 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #3 | Twitch.tv/maxvep | 82 | 0.33 | 2 min |
| #4 | tr1pb | 65 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | ruoska CSGO500 | 47 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ellu<3 | +5.59 | 96 | 64 |
| #2 | jappe | +3.44 | 75 | 69 |
| #3 | 1 | +2.98 | 83 | 80 |
| #4 | dmoN w tr4cksuit | +1.46 | 72 | 73 |
| #5 | ruoska CSGO500 | +1.40 | 76 | 54 |





