








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 520 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 831 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10010 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,537 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8641 | 38% |
| Smokes | 4157 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 6154 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3585 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,318,823 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 323 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fatboy | 52% | 174 |
| #2 | Meth-AnKretmine | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | Leo | 47% | 180 |
| #4 | Accel | 45% | 64 |
| #5 | Zéd | 41% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fatboy | 52% | 174 |
| #2 | Meth-AnKretmine | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | Leo | 47% | 180 |
| #4 | Accel | 45% | 64 |
| #5 | Zéd | 41% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leo | 17 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Fatboy | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Meth-AnKretmine | 5 | 0.0050 |
| #4 | Accel | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Zéd | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fatboy | 266 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #2 | Zéd | 92 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | Meth-AnKretmine | 80 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Leo | 75 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | Accel | 37 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fatboy | +1.59 | 68 | 39 |
| #2 | Zéd | +0.63 | 48 | 63 |
| #3 | Darkind | +0.60 | 54 | 44 |
| #4 | Meth-AnKretmine | -0.08 | 23 | 50 |
| #5 | Leo | -1.11 | 25 | 37 |





