








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 477 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Wingman | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2785 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,127 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2973 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2101 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2022 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2031 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $472,353 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 648 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Nymphh (ex semi-pro) | 57% | 46 |
| #3 | JohaNzzo | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | solaren | 54% | 56 |
| #5 | XANAXTARES | 50% | 18 |
| #6 | Broken BS | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | solaren | +1.80 | 69 | 50 |
| #2 | K3 | +1.37 | 63 | 53 |
| #3 | JohaNzzo | +1.32 | 81 | 50 |
| #4 | Nymphh (ex semi-pro) | +0.97 | 76 | 57 |
| #5 | Broken BS | +0.69 | 33 | 54 |





