








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 512 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 164 matches | ||
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4724 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,837 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4001 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4875 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3429 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4532 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,077,418 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plohx | 69% | 36 |
| #2 | D3troX | 68% | 80 |
| #3 | sesam1us | 66% | 77 |
| #4 | yeah dude | 64% | 84 |
| #5 | ANDREW TATE | 62% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Naa | 53% | 72 |
| #10 | iGYAT sNuzz | 52% | 29 |
| #11 | pingAbuser | 50% | 30 |
| #12 | 22 | 50% | 54 |
| #13 | Flic'n'Lic™ | 47% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pingAbuser | 7 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | yeah dude | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | sesam1us | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | D3troX | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | 22 | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yeah dude | 410 | 0.22 | 10 min |
| #2 | sesam1us | 357 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #3 | D3troX | 202 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | 22 | 165 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | iGYAT sNuzz | 148 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 22 | +2.18 | 83 | 61 |
| #2 | k1n | +2.11 | 80 | 62 |
| #3 | sesam1us | +1.79 | 74 | 72 |
| #4 | Davvid- | +1.02 | 82 | 70 |
| #5 | D3troX | +0.98 | 86 | 59 |





