








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 347 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
694 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,931 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 502 | 26% |
| Smokes | 501 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 376 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 552 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $384,411 of utility $252 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shrek harvey | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | yoda gaming | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | Pastrami Daniel | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | maestro de la paja | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | ThaiTea | 57% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ThaiTea | 177 | 0.31 | 6 min |
| #2 | Spirit | 110 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | stax | 93 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | maestro de la paja | 36 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | |Phantom| | 31 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shrek harvey | +5.75 | 93 | 58 |
| #2 | Pastrami Daniel | +4.10 | 65 | 49 |
| #3 | Spirit | +3.73 | 86 | 47 |
| #4 | stax | +1.94 | 66 | 55 |
| #5 | ThaiTea | +0.49 | 69 | 74 |





