








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 101 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
463 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,335 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 364 | 27% |
| Smokes | 257 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 445 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 269 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $266,918 of utility $275 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | G1NI | 52% | 23 |
| #6 | snuit | 51% | 39 |
| #7 | Tosi hyvä cs pelaaja | 48% | 31 |
| #8 | kSM | 40% | 10 |
| #9 | Ape with AK47 | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snuit | 75 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | G1NI | 59 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | Tosi hyvä cs pelaaja | 53 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Ape with AK47 | 48 | 0.28 | 1 min |
| #5 | kSM | 45 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kSM | +3.75 | 84 | 77 |
| #2 | snuit | +1.47 | 70 | 54 |
| #3 | Empulzon | +0.53 | 58 | 62 |
| #4 | sliM | +0.16 | 63 | 70 |
| #5 | G1NI | +0.02 | 69 | 68 |





