








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 424 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1914 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,150 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1168 | 37% |
| Smokes | 635 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1009 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 338 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $638,725 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 175 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TAJLN | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | Iris | 61% | 72 |
| #3 | Miro | 59% | 58 |
| #4 | Josip Broz Pitoツ | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | jebem vam matr | 48% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Josip Broz Pitoツ | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | jebem vam matr | 48% | 52 |
| #6 | Kobal_7 | 47% | 49 |
| #7 | BaJezus | 33% | 18 |
| #8 | lilsteffy | 32% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iris | 12 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | jebem vam matr | 9 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Miro | 7 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Kobal_7 | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | lilsteffy | 2 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iris | 120 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | Miro | 89 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Kobal_7 | 79 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | jebem vam matr | 72 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | lilsteffy | 67 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | janez jansa | +3.43 | 79 | 54 |
| #2 | BaJezus | +1.15 | 52 | 46 |
| #3 | Iris | +0.13 | 52 | 52 |
| #4 | lilsteffy | +0.01 | 34 | 43 |
| #5 | Miro | -0.98 | 37 | 65 |





