








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 418 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Palacio | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
690 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,159 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 555 | 26% |
| Smokes | 378 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 686 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 540 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $409,339 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iris | 68% | 25 |
| #2 | Scuba | 65% | 69 |
| #3 | janez jansa | 64% | 25 |
| #4 | jebem vam matr | 61% | 18 |
| #5 | Miro | 59% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iris | 8 | 0.0173 |
| #2 | Miro | 4 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | jebem vam matr | 4 | 0.0116 |
| #4 | Scuba | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Kobal_7 | 2 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Scuba | 98 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | janez jansa | 49 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Iris | 41 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Kobal_7 | 41 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Miro | 34 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Scuba | +9.35 | 94 | 59 |
| #2 | jebem vam matr | +5.07 | 80 | 57 |
| #3 | janez jansa | +3.61 | 77 | 55 |
| #4 | Iris | +3.41 | 71 | 47 |
| #5 | BaJezus | +1.15 | 52 | 50 |





