








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 9 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
731 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,272 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 503 | 22% |
| Smokes | 646 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 591 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 532 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $342,132 of utility $210 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 239 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spönö | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | Malisen Miikka | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | Jyri Possu | 57% | 61 |
| #4 | make | 50% | 4 |
| #5 | GodLike | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spönö | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | Malisen Miikka | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | Jyri Possu | 57% | 61 |
| #4 | make | 50% | 4 |
| #5 | GodLike | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jyri Possu | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Spönö | 1 | 0.0127 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jyri Possu | 192 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | Malisen Miikka | 15 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #3 | Spönö | 10 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #4 | make | 4 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | GodLike | 3 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GodLike | +3.65 | 76 | 67 |
| #2 | Spönö | +3.24 | 67 | 45 |
| #3 | Pҽʅσƚƚαʋα Pσɳƚʂσ | +1.38 | 64 | 62 |
| #4 | Jyri Possu | +0.45 | 56 | 60 |
| #5 | Malisen Miikka | +0.39 | 73 | 41 |





