








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 815 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 308 matches | ||
| Faceit | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 55 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




171 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8117 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,235 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5206 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4685 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4288 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4056 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,318,791 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2644 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GodLike | 63% | 46 |
| #2 | mesis | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | prinsessa elsa | 58% | 97 |
| #4 | Keke Smullberg | 57% | 120 |
| #5 | SikaNiska | 54% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keke Smullberg | 31 | 0.0126 |
| #2 | prinsessa elsa | 24 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | SikaNiska | 21 | 0.0122 |
| #4 | make | 20 | 0.0122 |
| #5 | Kalevi A. Penttinen | 18 | 0.0122 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prinsessa elsa | 282 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #2 | ryydman | 272 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | Larppis | 270 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | GodLike | 216 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #5 | SikaNiska | 202 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GodLike | +3.55 | 80 | 62 |
| #2 | Malisen Miikka | +2.42 | 83 | 53 |
| #3 | mesis | +1.55 | 77 | 62 |
| #4 | prinsessa elsa | +1.15 | 74 | 40 |
| #5 | SikaNiska | +1.04 | 82 | 67 |





