








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 183 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2057 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,887 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2180 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1301 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2234 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1172 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $661,839 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 164 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iamfsh | 53% | 38 |
| #2 | T-Raw | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | FREETHUGGER | 50% | 26 |
| #4 | myer | 49% | 35 |
| #5 | mom | 42% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | T-Raw | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | FREETHUGGER | 50% | 26 |
| #4 | myer | 49% | 35 |
| #5 | mom | 42% | 38 |
| #6 | hutsoon | 42% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutsoon | 10 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | myer | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | mom | 3 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | FREETHUGGER | 3 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | T-Raw | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutsoon | 208 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | mom | 120 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | iamfsh | 88 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | FREETHUGGER | 69 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | myer | 38 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iamfsh | +3.01 | 76 | 65 |
| #2 | myer | +1.87 | 59 | 61 |
| #3 | mom | +0.57 | 67 | 53 |
| #4 | FREETHUGGER | +0.47 | 59 | 60 |
| #5 | laglace! | +0.03 | 74 | 60 |





