








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 258 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1208 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,790 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1235 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1037 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 677 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 841 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $207,814 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 131 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | yxan | 61% | 33 |
| #5 | npobu | 58% | 43 |
| #6 | SwixY | 56% | 16 |
| #7 | ree | 50% | 18 |
| #8 | Neeko | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yxan | 9 | 0.0137 |
| #2 | Chinko Daisuki | 5 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | npobu | 4 | 0.0050 |
| #4 | SwixY | 4 | 0.0122 |
| #5 | ree | 2 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | npobu | 120 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | yxan | 87 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | SwixY | 50 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | ree | 42 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Chinko Daisuki | 36 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yxan | +3.46 | 49 | 47 |
| #2 | B | +3.13 | 82 | 67 |
| #3 | SwixY | +3.01 | 75 | 55 |
| #4 | npobu | +1.69 | 45 | 57 |
| #5 | Neeko | +1.50 | 70 | 53 |





