








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 149 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1795 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,320 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1804 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1016 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1277 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1223 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $118,590 of utility $27 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 146 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The OG Reaper | 87% | 15 |
| #2 | 𝕯𝖊𝖆𝖙𝖍 | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | Typical | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | Goku | 46% | 35 |
| #5 | Bullfrog | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goku | 6 | 0.0095 |
| #2 | Bullfrog | 4 | 0.0122 |
| #3 | 𝕯𝖊𝖆𝖙𝖍 | 4 | 0.0141 |
| #4 | SourBaby☯ | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | The OG Reaper | 2 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goku | 58 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | Bullfrog | 44 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | SourBaby☯ | 39 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | 𝕯𝖊𝖆𝖙𝖍 | 39 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | The OG Reaper | 37 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The OG Reaper | +7.84 | 90 | 61 |
| #2 | 𝕯𝖊𝖆𝖙𝖍 | +2.36 | 84 | 51 |
| #3 | Bullfrog | +1.11 | 63 | 46 |
| #4 | Goku | -0.57 | 36 | 19 |
| #5 | Cinnamon | -0.61 | 48 | 50 |





