








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 816 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 739 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




69 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9799 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,053 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8770 | 29% |
| Smokes | 6478 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 8818 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5987 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,997,852 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1639 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Èl Kake | 52% | 306 |
| #2 | käpy | 50% | 149 |
| #3 | Duunitori.fi | 50% | 100 |
| #4 | Samppu | 50% | 719 |
| #5 | MOKA | 49% | 340 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samppu | 68 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | MOKA | 67 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | Èl Kake | 16 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | käpy | 13 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | Duunitori.fi | 9 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samppu | 1813 | 0.12 | 56 min |
| #2 | MOKA | 1134 | 0.16 | 27 min |
| #3 | Èl Kake | 861 | 0.13 | 21 min |
| #4 | s))) | 440 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #5 | Duunitori.fi | 355 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samppu | +1.27 | 52 | 61 |
| #2 | nUgez | +0.76 | 63 | 65 |
| #3 | s))) | -0.33 | 55 | 48 |
| #4 | Èl Kake | -0.44 | 67 | 57 |
| #5 | käpy | -0.64 | 38 | 42 |





