








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 41 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
102 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 274 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 43 | 16% |
| Smokes | 86 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 61 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 84 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $62,518 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | artist | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | shampowo | 50% | 4 |
| #3 | Huncho | 45% | 11 |
| #4 | Tuntalunta | 43% | 21 |
| #5 | Y u n g M e m e 美 学 | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shampowo | 1 | 0.0114 |
| #2 | artist | 1 | 0.0233 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tuntalunta | 20 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #2 | Carnage | 20 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Huncho | 18 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Howard | 12 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | shampowo | 12 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carnage | +8.59 | 91 | 63 |
| #2 | Huncho | +4.71 | 84 | 46 |
| #3 | shampowo | +3.22 | 65 | 33 |
| #4 | Howard | -2.42 | 43 | 65 |
| #5 | Lard | -2.82 | 22 | 32 |





