








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 32 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1380 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,000 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 520 | 17% |
| Smokes | 524 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1146 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 810 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $140,681 of utility $42 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 116 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jeffery | 55% | 40 |
| #2 | RANDOM | 54% | 76 |
| #3 | Steph curry fan page 73 | 50% | 129 |
| #4 | ᠌ 2049 | 50% | 68 |
| #5 | ddd | 48% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steph curry fan page 73 | 25 | 0.0095 |
| #2 | RANDOM | 9 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | ᠌ 2049 | 7 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Jeffery | 7 | 0.0085 |
| #5 | ddd | 5 | 0.0098 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RANDOM | +3.06 | 58 | 17 |
| #2 | TittySlayer69 | +2.25 | 60 | 48 |
| #3 | Steph curry fan page 73 | +0.25 | 51 | 36 |
| #4 | ᠌ 2049 | -1.22 | 61 | 38 |
| #5 | ddd | -1.25 | 55 | 39 |





