








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
995 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,285 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 543 | 24% |
| Smokes | 765 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 384 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 593 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $112,154 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wohn Jick | 33% | 21 |
| #2 | JCN=Bandit¹ | 32% | 22 |
| #3 | Black Jesus | 30% | 53 |
| #4 | Ripziez | 29% | 49 |
| #5 | PurpleStark | 21% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wohn Jick | 33% | 21 |
| #2 | JCN=Bandit¹ | 32% | 22 |
| #3 | Black Jesus | 30% | 53 |
| #4 | Ripziez | 29% | 49 |
| #5 | PurpleStark | 21% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ripziez | 7 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | Wohn Jick | 4 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Black Jesus | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | JCN=Bandit¹ | 2 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Black Jesus | 71 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #2 | Ripziez | 58 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | JCN=Bandit¹ | 16 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | PurpleStark | 10 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #5 | Wohn Jick | 2 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wohn Jick | +5.41 | 72 | 18 |
| #2 | Khan™ | +2.42 | 73 | 53 |
| #3 | Ripziez | -0.18 | 30 | 50 |
| #4 | JCN=Bandit¹ | -2.71 | 48 | 27 |
| #5 | Black Jesus | -4.50 | 24 | 34 |





