










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
348 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 918 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 265 | 29% |
| Smokes | 187 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 259 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 207 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $44,311 of utility $51 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | intellectual dog | 4 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Turles | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | snow leopard | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | intellectual dog | +5.41 | 82 | 59 |
| #2 | dry | +2.70 | 73 | 24 |
| #3 | snow leopard | +2.24 | 73 | 57 |
| #4 | mad scientist | -0.81 | 66 | 42 |
| #5 | Turles | -2.23 | 55 | 27 |





