








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 218 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
453 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,051 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 210 | 20% |
| Smokes | 394 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 230 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 217 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $455,875 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lemons | 51% | 47 |
| #2 | Chunky Cheese Rat | 46% | 28 |
| #3 | 💎Diamondz💎 | 43% | 21 |
| #4 | poztix | 38% | 8 |
| #5 | Lil Cheesy | 11% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lemons | 51% | 47 |
| #2 | Chunky Cheese Rat | 46% | 28 |
| #3 | 💎Diamondz💎 | 43% | 21 |
| #4 | poztix | 38% | 8 |
| #5 | Lil Cheesy | 11% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lemons | 4 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | 💎Diamondz💎 | 4 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | poztix | 3 | 0.0164 |
| #4 | Chunky Cheese Rat | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lemons | 228 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #2 | Chunky Cheese Rat | 33 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #3 | 💎Diamondz💎 | 29 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | poztix | 17 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Lil Cheesy | 3 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lemons | +11.40 | 83 | 64 |
| #2 | poztix | +3.44 | 68 | 47 |
| #3 | 💎Diamondz💎 | +0.68 | 39 | 63 |
| #4 | Lil Cheesy | -3.91 | 29 | 25 |
| #5 | WilbertTheGreat | -5.81 | 7 | 18 |





