










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 498 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 227 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3743 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,572 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3837 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4860 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 2456 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2419 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,529,123 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sabka malik ek | 71% | 28 |
| #2 | EgLeO | 61% | 36 |
| #3 | Syndicate | 57% | 28 |
| #4 | GOAT | 54% | 28 |
| #5 | _SuperPotato_ | 53% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #18 | GHOST | 39% | 38 |
| #19 | SpecOPS Ultra | 39% | 92 |
| #20 | Wade Wilson | 39% | 72 |
| #21 | Toxic Kasai | 37% | 35 |
| #22 | viper | 36% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Geralt of Rivia | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | _Ex6TenZ_ | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | sabka malik ek | 4 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | SpecOPS Ultra | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Shiftwalker Teja | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Geralt of Rivia | 341 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #2 | SpecOPS Ultra | 297 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #3 | Shiftwalker Teja | 177 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | GHOST | 148 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #5 | HughJass | 139 | 0.11 | 4 min |





