










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 962 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 221 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6915 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,617 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 720 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1715 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1534 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1648 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,411,737 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2475 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | crow [yurination] | 43% | 87 |
| #9 | yurinary incontinence | 41% | 150 |
| #10 | Oupi Goupi | 41% | 76 |
| #11 | chrome heart nipple ring | 40% | 43 |
| #12 | stunnerboy biggest fan | 36% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [RC] Chaos Insurgency | +5.44 | 55 | 36 |
| #2 | boioioioioiong | +2.60 | 78 | 49 |
| #3 | I Meow for treats | +2.40 | 63 | 31 |
| #4 | yurinary incontinence | +1.40 | 63 | 53 |
| #5 | 9 | +0.17 | 67 | 43 |





