








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 295 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 1,835 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1291 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,565 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 987 | 28% |
| Smokes | 867 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1014 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 697 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $399,373 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 50 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | froz | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | Pelottava Poistaja | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | AkseliOnCrack | 54% | 24 |
| #4 | Jake- | 51% | 47 |
| #5 | P Y R Y´ | 50% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P Y R Y´ | 314 | 0.34 | 9 min |
| #2 | Jake- | 183 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | AkseliOnCrack | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | Pelottava Poistaja | 40 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Valdemar | 32 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pelottava Poistaja | +2.50 | 83 | 47 |
| #2 | froz | +2.34 | 93 | 75 |
| #3 | P Y R Y´ | +1.79 | 68 | 70 |
| #4 | AkseliOnCrack | +1.12 | 79 | 63 |
| #5 | Jake- | +0.02 | 72 | 59 |





