








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 45 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
684 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,989 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 447 | 22% |
| Smokes | 351 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 532 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 659 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $351,336 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 50 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NaoNッ | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | artii | 58% | 36 |
| #3 | gungnir | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | X1ZzeR ツ | 47% | 73 |
| #5 | TheBlackbasha | Pvpro.com | 38% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | artii | 58% | 36 |
| #3 | gungnir | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | X1ZzeR ツ | 47% | 73 |
| #5 | TheBlackbasha | Pvpro.com | 38% | 39 |
| #6 | KartofSnitel | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | X1ZzeR ツ | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | gungnir | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | artii | 3 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | X1ZzeR ツ | 332 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #2 | artii | 221 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #3 | gungnir | 31 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | TheBlackbasha | Pvpro.com | 17 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | KartofSnitel | 14 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | X1ZzeR ツ | +2.01 | 73 | 71 |
| #2 | TheBlackbasha | Pvpro.com | +1.95 | 82 | 43 |
| #3 | NaoNッ | +1.86 | 54 | 65 |
| #4 | KartofSnitel | +0.79 | 73 | 69 |
| #5 | artii | +0.57 | 55 | 84 |





