








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1303 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 782 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




249 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11400 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,644 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 878 | 24% |
| Smokes | 667 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1512 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 587 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,055,836 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2384 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goth Catgirl | 75% | 107 |
| #2 | jico | 72% | 222 |
| #3 | edward | 71% | 398 |
| #4 | spencer from icarly | 70% | 88 |
| #5 | sleeper! | 67% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | edward | 610 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #2 | jico | 466 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | spencer from icarly | 407 | 0.25 | 8 min |
| #4 | Goth Catgirl | 380 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #5 | Mari | 166 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | spencer from icarly | +4.15 | 72 | 62 |
| #2 | edward | +2.87 | 75 | 60 |
| #3 | Goth Catgirl | +2.70 | 56 | 70 |
| #4 | Mari | +2.28 | 74 | 11 |
| #5 | firecock | +1.87 | 46 | 36 |





